I remember being 5 years old, sitting in my grandmothers bed watching the Emmys; In awe with the roaring round of applause that came when this stunning black woman (I knew nothing about) won an award. I remember my exact thoughts at that time.. " I am going do that one day, and everybody is going to STAND and clap for ME." I was just a little girl, but I knew I belonged on TV. As, cliche as this sounds, its true. I've always been a dreamer.
I began dancing at 3, I remember my first tu-tu , and my first dance recital. I was a hit, at least thats what my mama said, and I believed her. For years to come, I danced with Alyo Childrens Dance Theater and performed all over the Chicagoland area, as well as small national tours. A star being groomed to shine as bright as she could.
After high school, it was time to make one of the biggest decisions in my life. What would I do with myself now? At this time, I had no interest in going to college. I was wrapped up in the ever changing battle that was taking place inside my mind. Who is Kadidra? So I went on a journey, what some like to call soul searching.
I relocated to Houston to live with my father and I began to discover who I was.
In 1998 I began doing poetry slams at a local amateur spot in Houston called Just Joking. They would pay the winner of the contest $50 and you would compete against the following weeks contestants. I won for 3 weeks in a row, before I let someone else win the competition by not performing at all. It was outside this very club that I ran into an old friend of mine from Chicago.
He let me know he was really into my work, and thought I possessed a talent that I was unaware of. Not too long after reuniting with my old time friend, I found myself in the studio, completely loss, recording a song, that you will probably NEVER hear. And this was the 2nd coming of Kadidra....Ms. Butta Jones.
Now here I am, 12 years later, still dreaming.
I will be 30 years old this year, and I haven't given up, I haven't loss hope, and I still think back on the first time I saw that mystery lady win her award.
But I look at my surroundings now, my car got left in Houston when I relocated back to Atlanta for the 2nd time. I loved Apple, but honey, lemme tell you, that car was begging me to stop trying to fix her up. I've been in the restaurant industry for the last 11 years and its cool, but come on. Sometimes I get frustrated when I want something I cant have because funds are low, (and I only have one mouth to feed). On the fifth, I have to prioritize all bills, and see what will get paid right away, and what is going to have to wait awhile. And that my friends, is no fun.
I sit on my couch and talk with childhood friends watching my basic tv (not basic cable), and listen to the different paths they have chosen to take. Ayinke, is about to take her bar exam. Bahati is a statistician. Negarra is in the Netherlands "doing culture". Mario is an accountant. Nicole has her masters in Athletic Administration. And Tu-Tu just joined a reputable law firm out of Maryland. I am extremely proud of them, but I'm sure you get the point.
However, in saying that, the path I have chosen to take has definitely been filled with star-studded memories, and a collage of colorful events. From lunch with the infamous Suge Knight to putting corn puffs in Brad Jordan's (Scarface) hair, to photography with hip-hop Enquirer, and editor and photographer at Rasha Entertainment. I have partied with the greatest, and broke bread with classic b-boys. Priceless.
Ive lived in Atlanta, Houston and Chicago. Ive traveled to over half of the 50 states. I've performed with a live band, and visited Puerto Rico for 10 days on a wish....Matter of fact, most of my life experiences have been random.
I began dancing at 3, I remember my first tu-tu , and my first dance recital. I was a hit, at least thats what my mama said, and I believed her. For years to come, I danced with Alyo Childrens Dance Theater and performed all over the Chicagoland area, as well as small national tours. A star being groomed to shine as bright as she could.
After high school, it was time to make one of the biggest decisions in my life. What would I do with myself now? At this time, I had no interest in going to college. I was wrapped up in the ever changing battle that was taking place inside my mind. Who is Kadidra? So I went on a journey, what some like to call soul searching.
I relocated to Houston to live with my father and I began to discover who I was.
In 1998 I began doing poetry slams at a local amateur spot in Houston called Just Joking. They would pay the winner of the contest $50 and you would compete against the following weeks contestants. I won for 3 weeks in a row, before I let someone else win the competition by not performing at all. It was outside this very club that I ran into an old friend of mine from Chicago.
He let me know he was really into my work, and thought I possessed a talent that I was unaware of. Not too long after reuniting with my old time friend, I found myself in the studio, completely loss, recording a song, that you will probably NEVER hear. And this was the 2nd coming of Kadidra....Ms. Butta Jones.
Now here I am, 12 years later, still dreaming.
I will be 30 years old this year, and I haven't given up, I haven't loss hope, and I still think back on the first time I saw that mystery lady win her award.
But I look at my surroundings now, my car got left in Houston when I relocated back to Atlanta for the 2nd time. I loved Apple, but honey, lemme tell you, that car was begging me to stop trying to fix her up. I've been in the restaurant industry for the last 11 years and its cool, but come on. Sometimes I get frustrated when I want something I cant have because funds are low, (and I only have one mouth to feed). On the fifth, I have to prioritize all bills, and see what will get paid right away, and what is going to have to wait awhile. And that my friends, is no fun.
I sit on my couch and talk with childhood friends watching my basic tv (not basic cable), and listen to the different paths they have chosen to take. Ayinke, is about to take her bar exam. Bahati is a statistician. Negarra is in the Netherlands "doing culture". Mario is an accountant. Nicole has her masters in Athletic Administration. And Tu-Tu just joined a reputable law firm out of Maryland. I am extremely proud of them, but I'm sure you get the point.
However, in saying that, the path I have chosen to take has definitely been filled with star-studded memories, and a collage of colorful events. From lunch with the infamous Suge Knight to putting corn puffs in Brad Jordan's (Scarface) hair, to photography with hip-hop Enquirer, and editor and photographer at Rasha Entertainment. I have partied with the greatest, and broke bread with classic b-boys. Priceless.
Ive lived in Atlanta, Houston and Chicago. Ive traveled to over half of the 50 states. I've performed with a live band, and visited Puerto Rico for 10 days on a wish....Matter of fact, most of my life experiences have been random.
In saying all this, I have come to realize I am most pleased with following my heart, my dreams are fulfilling to my spirit and I wouldn't compromise that for the world. Ive also learned what success truly means, and I will never stop dreaming.
Oh, and that "mystery lady" that won the award was Jackee Harry (from 227). I learned later she was the first african-american woman to win an Emmy for best supporting role.......she too was a dreamer.
